You often hear people say, & # 39; be you & # 39; or – be honest with you & # 39; or & # 39; just be you & # 39; Many legendary quotes talk about this concept and it is one of the topics that I am most passionate about.
I deeply believe (and have experienced it with hundreds of people) that if we are 'true to ourselves', we will experience greater success and more satisfaction with less stress and frustration along the way.
My main goal as a coach and consultant is to help people do just that: live a life of greater happiness, fulfillment and success; to get them out of where they are, where they want to be eliminating any obstacle in the way; and to help them take one more step, towards health, towards balance, towards fulfillment.
While there are many (amazing) books, courses, programs and tips on how to live a life you love I always come back to the conclusion that the quickest way to get there is to be honest with you and return to ]who you are.
In this article, I will share with you the importance of being true for yourself to get back on track.
There's no place like home, her true self
In the movie "The Wizard of Oz", Dorothy hits her ruby-colored shoes and repeats "There's no place like home, there's no place like home, there is no place like home … "
The same is true for each one of us. There is no place like home. There is a core in each of us where we thrive. This place or "state" is a reservoir from which we generate health and energy. And ultimately, your body, mind and spirit yearn to return to this "home".
Much of our stress, anguish and frustration are due to our being disconnected or misaligned from the source of who we are.
Why people stop being true to themselves
From very young, we are dragged out of the way of being true to ourselves by well-intentioned family members, teachers, the educational system, our communities and society.
Maybe they told him to shut up when he had a lot to say; or maybe your curiosity was crushed when you & # 39; why? & # 39; they met with me because I said so & # 39 ;; or your creativity and free spirit were stifled when they forced you to fit in and sit quietly in a traditional class environment.
There are hundreds of examples of this, and I'm sure you have your own.
In fact, we as a culture, as a society, as a humanity, are derailed now, more than ever. We are discouraged by the multitude of challenges in our own lives, by what is happening in our countries and in the world. There are unrealistic expectations and demands that come from everywhere.
Our 24-hour technology-driven world takes us out of the way. We are being dragged in different and sometimes even opposite directions, playing the many roles in our lives: employee, friend, father, partner. All these diverse roles have their own demands and expectations.
We read books on how we should do things, take courses on what we are supposed to do and try to model what we see others do to improve ourselves or be the correct influence for others. And depending on the day of the week, or the time of year, or the last article or study …… the advice is often different and conflicting.
What happens if you're not honest with yourself?
No wonder there are such amazing statistics on stress, health and well-being, especially here in the USA. USA:
- 77% of Americans meet regularly experiencing physical and emotional stress symptoms
- More than 50% of adults have a chronic health problem that includes heart disease, stroke , cancer, type 2 diabetes, obesity and arthritis.
- 55% of people regularly take a prescription medication.
- Worldwide, the most recent Gallup poll showed that 85% of people around the world hate their jobs.
Unfortunately, I could continue. But I will not. Fortunately, you understand the point I am trying to make here.
For one reason or another, we are disconnected from our central self, we have slipped out of alignment with what we really are and what we already know. And that friction, that pull has important and generalized consequences for each one individually, and the health of our communities, organizations and, frankly, the world.
Let's think about "being true to oneself" like a magnet. Your central self is bound to return home, it is your "adjustment mechanism". But the circumstances and crises of life can actually have a stronger and more demanding pull. When they take you out of your base, it's as if a magnet is torn from your accessory.
What happens when you remove a magnet? It becomes unstable, try to return. But if you allow it, it will go back to its place. Again, if you try to push it away, it shakes again. Think of this tremor like the way the imam says, "Please, I want to go home, I need to go home."
The warning signs (that you ignore)
Now think of this for yourself. When you separate yourself from your central self, to be faithful to yourself, what do you experience? Do you get "unstable" like the magnet?
This "disorientation" can manifest itself as:
- Physical symptoms such as lack of energy, headaches, stomach problems, tense muscles, frequent colds and infections, fast heartbeat, chest pain, you name it.
- Emotional symptoms may include feelings of anger, frustration, depression, loneliness and, ultimately, depression or anxiety.
These & # 39; warning signs & # 39; they are his body's way of saying: "I want to go home", I need to be there.
But most of the time, we ignore them. We keep pushing them or forcing us to keep going. If we have a headache, we take Advil; if we have high blood pressure, we get a prescription; If we feel depressed or anxious, we drink a bottle of wine or take a tranquilizer.
But the reason why those things are appearing is that tells you something. Your body may be telling you or even screaming at you that something is not working. What we really should do is stop and identify the "why" behind the symptoms that we are experiencing. These often refer to the fact that we are off the track of our true selves and what works best for us.
The unintended consequence
What happens if the magnet separates completely? What happens when you pull it so far away that it can no longer find "home"?
Loses his sense of self. Like a compass that has lost its "true north". He has no sense of direction, he is lost, confused and anxious.
Without this sense of "belonging", you may experience the sensation of being on the verge of collapsing and burning. This is what is happening to many of us. We do not even know where it is & # 39; home & # 39;
But you DO IT. Your central sense of self knows it! He knows exactly where the home is.
How to be faithful to you and get back on track
At this time, you might think that all this sounds wonderful. But how do you get back on track? Some of you may even be wondering how being true to yourself seems more.
Here are 11 ways to be true to you and get back on track again:
1. Identify what you need to thrive
One way to solve this is to think about moments in your life when you felt fantastic. In addition to everything, under control, in the "zone".
Think about moments in your life where you felt happiest, fulfilled and successful. Write them.
Now, think about what was about those times that made them so great? Was it the environment you were in? The people you were surrounded by? Something you were building or creating? Or maybe a feeling you had? Perhaps you had a clear image, a plan, a purpose or challenge?
2. Think about what makes you happy
Really happy! What makes you feel joy? Laugh? What do you like to do? Are you doing that? Why not? How can you live more in touch with your passions or be doing more of the things that make you happy?
3. Identify what makes you feel more like you
Think about when you feel more like you. What makes you feel connected, connected and centered with what you are.
Is it time with friends and family? Meditation or Yoga? To be a complete risky and risky venture? Connect with something deeper and more meaningful on a spiritual level? How can you get more of that in your life? What feeds your soul to a deep level?
4. Know when you do not feel like you
To get back on track, you must first know that you are deviant. That's why it's so important to know when you do not feel that way.
How do you know when things do not work for you? Think of what gets you out of the stride? We talked earlier about the physical and emotional symptoms that appear. What are those for you? What do you think, hear or feel?
Notice. Pay attention to these & # 39; early warning signs & # 39; that your mind and body are sending you.
5. Look at your core values
Do you know what is most important to you? How can you prioritize and put those things first? If one of your core values is the family, how can you live longer? Maybe it's health, what are you doing towards greater health?
6. Use your talents
What are the innate strengths or talents you could be using more? Your inner genius? Are you amazing at solving problems, listening to friends or cooking healthy and healthy foods? Where can you use that talent, now?
7. Connect with your purpose
Some people are very clear about their purpose, others are still searching. I know this is a big one.
Even if you are not clear about your purpose, are you living every day with a purpose? By the way? With a clear intention? Or have you been distracted by distractions, expectations or life?
8. Concentrate on caring for all of you
Go back to the basics with a healthy diet and a healthy life. Focus on your general well-being. Take care of your body. Does that mean you need to exercise more? Sleeping more? Mediate more often? Eat less?
I am a great defender of a healthy body. While I believe that this piece is important, it is also important to bear in mind that you could work days and years in your health, nutrition, hydration, etc. But if you do not step back and look at the energetic parts of you, you will not make much progress.
9. Rediscover what you liked before things got so busy
Was I hiking in the open air? Being with friends? Sitting in the library reading a good book? Do not do absolutely nothing?
10. Take a test
I know this may sound strange when you try to meet. And yes, the answers are inside you. However, I know that soul searching can be a difficult job. Sometimes, it helps to start a little.
My favorite test to help you discover what seems true to you: The Instinctive Drives (I.D.). Identify what you need to be the best you can. Look at the proof here: The Instinctive Drives (ID)
It's different from other tools I've tried because instead of focusing on the personality or your behavior, it sinks deep into the nucleus, the innate part of you, and helps you understand what you need to thrive.
11. Let Go Go
Let go of the expectations of others who are not serving you. Release the way you "should" do things. Let go of who you are trying to be and instead try to be you.
We try our best to please, meet expectations, make others happy or fit. A lot about being honest with you is about what you let go as much as what you cling to.
Once I read a quote that fits perfectly with this feeling:
As you can imagine, you do not have to do all 11 to start again track. Only one step in the right direction will begin to take you home.
How do you know which one to start with? Like the magnet, look which ones "attract" you. Which of these resonated more with you? If you are not sure, read them again and see which one has that magnetic pull. Your central being knows which of these is the next reason to focus.
The next step?
Take a step. A step to get closer to you. A step to get back on track A step to be honest with yourself
What is that step for you?